Valentines Day Folly part one
by cerberus1
Summary: The three saiyans go v-day shopping for thier mates, when two presents get mixed-up
1. Default Chapter Title

Note I don't own dbz or the characters, I do own a pet iguana and a shirt so there's no point in suing me anyway.  
  
  
VALENTINES DAY FOLLY  
  
  
Valentines Day? What the hell is that? Asked Vegeta, This planet and it's stupid customs and holidays, he thought as he waited for Goku to reply.  
"Valentines Day is the day on earth that everybody shows the person they love how they feel." Goku replied.  
"Oh let me guess it's so guys can mess around being jerks for the rest of the year and suck up on one pathetic day, to there spouses."  
"Um yeah some guys do, I guess. But it's also a good time to buy your wife something nice and sweet so she doesn't kill you when you raid the fridge."  
"I already married the damn woman I can't believe that's not proof enough." Vegeta scowled, he couldn't believe he came over to Kakarrot's house to spar, and instead he suggests to go shopping, for some pointless human custom.  
"Well that's where Gohan and I are going to do today, I really wish I could spar but Valentines day is tomorrow, and ChiChi is on the rampage enough already."  
"Humph," Vegeta was mad now, " Well fine I'll go along, but we're leaving now, the sooner we get there the sooner we can leave and come back and spar."  
"Um okay Gohan we're going now."  
"What hey Vegeta your coming to?" Gohan asked as he grabbed his wallet.  
"Yeah but only because I'm trying to get Kakkarot back as soon as possible, I don't feel like messing around a mall all damn day when I could be doing something worthwhile."  
"Fair enough but you might as well by Bulma a gift while you're there though." Said Gohan. "That way it's not a complete waste of time for you."  
"Maybe, what the heck do you give them to make them shut up." Vegeta asked as they began flying in the direction of Satan City mall.  
"Flowers, stuffed animals, um jewelry", Goku rattled off a list outloud. "Chocolates, mmmmm chocolates" Goku then abruptly went into lala land dreaming of candy.  
"I'm still not sure what to get the girl that has everything yet." Said Gohan  
"What you mean the Satan chick? Are you looking to make her your mate or something?" Asked Vegeta as Gohan immediately turned red.  
"Well yeah uh no yes no well not quite yet." Gohan said sheepishly. "I guess we're waiting until we're married to do any uh mating" Gohan proceeded to deepen his hue at the last part.  
"Humph marriage yet another pointless custom that continue to astounds me about the stupidity of the planet." Vegeta said scornfully as he looked ahead. "There's the outskirts of Satan City," he said as he began to descend with Gohan and a daydreaming Goku in tow.  
When the got to the mall they were greeted by a medley of reds and pinks. And millions of hearts and flowers taped to the wall, in short the gaudiest place imaginable.   
"Oh wonderful I think I'm going to be sick. And not only that I'm going to hurl red and pink hearts."  
Gohan rolled his eyes, there was no reason to convince Vegeta to lighten up, he would never fully get earth holidays.  
They first stopped at a perfume store; Goku remembered ChiChi mentioning that she was running out of her favorite fragrance. So he figured it to be the perfect gift. Unfortunately he forget to check the name so he walked about the store sniffing each and every bottle on the shelves.  
"Kakarrot you Baka." Vegeta said as he watched Goku pick up a two bottles and smelled both.   
Gohan didn't reply to that, his dad did look pretty silly as he continued his mission to smell the hundreds of bottles residing on the shelves. We're going to be here awhile, he thought impatiently.  
"Would you like to try our new fragrance," a smiling saleslady asked Vegeta in an incredibly perky voice.  
"No go awa HEY!!!" It was too late the lady with the interminable smile sprayed Vegeta with every foul smelling perfume she carried on her tray. " WHA WHAT THE HELL THAT'S IT TAKE THIS GALLIC GUN BLAST!!!" Vegeta yelled as he shot three weak ki blasts straight into the store. When the dust settled the store had looked liked it had a went through a fire. And standing there in the middle of the wreckage was a stunned saleslady, who was covered from head to toe with dust. And to the corner was Goku looking at the obliterated shelves.   
"Uh oh how I'm supposed to Chichi's perfume now?" he said as he looked about, then he spied one bottle that miraculously survived. Goku casually walked over the rubble and sniffed it. "Hey what do you know? This is ChiChi's perfume," he exclaimed as he read the label, "Musk of the Physcho, huh whodathunk eh guys." Goku said happily as he put the correct amount of money on the charred counter and walked out.  
So the three men headed to the next destination as the rest of the crowd examined the wreckage in awe.  
"I can't believe you did that," Gohan said as they headed to the other section of the mall.  
"It was justified, thanks to that damn woman I smell like a skunk about to go on a hot date," He spat angrily. At this point he just wanted to leave as soon as possible.   
"Whatever just don't do it again okay I 'm surprised we got away with it, we might not be so lucky next time."  
"Hey Vegeta why don't you get Bulma some jewelry?" Goku asked changing the subject," De Beers has some really shiny stuff."  
Vegeta didn't get the chance to reply as he was dragged by the arm inside. The three men studied the jewelry trying to think which they spouses would appreciate most.   
" Hey this ones pretty," Gohan said holding the ring the salesmen just gave him, "So do you think Videl will like it? He asked. The two immediately started laughing.  
"heh planning to mate with her sooner eh Gohan?" Vegeta asked as he laughed some more.  
"What do you mean? What's so funny?" the demisaiyan asked confused.  
"HAH HAH Gohan that's an engagement ring," Said Goku. Who was downright giggling now.  
"WHAT!?" He screamed as he through the ring back at the salesmen, "Try that again buster and I swear they'll never find your body." Gohan threatened. (OOC I know I just wanted one of them to say that)  
Gohan walked out with the two males following still laughing at him. He wished they would shut up but was sort of glad they were there. He could imagine Mr. Satan's face if he accidentally gave his sixteen-year-old daughter an engagement ring.   
"Hey Vegeta why don't you get a T-shirt with the kissing teddy bears and wear it for Bulma she loves it when you wear the bad man shirt for her."   
"Kakkarot there is no way in hell I'm wearing a stupid teddy bear shirt, and if I do buy clothes I rather she wear it for me." He said he was really getting tired of all this dumb gifts they give each other.  
"Well then how about you buy her something from there," Goku said blushing as he pointed to the Victoria Secret store.  
Vegeta raised an eyebrow and smiled " now there's a gift idea that has some promise." He said as he walked in.   
"Gohan you coming?" asked Goku.  
"No way if the engagement ring was a bad idea, then her dad would surely kill me for lingerie." Gohan said as he walked into a hallmark. In there he found a beautiful pewter five-picture photo frame.  
This is perfect he thought as he admired the fine craftsmanship. Videl will love it.   
"Yes sir and would you like that gift wrapped it's free," The saleslady said as he prepared to buy it.  
"Um yeah that would be nice but can you wait a second?"  
"Of course"  
Gohan opened up the back of frame, and place five pictured of Videl and him that he kept in his wallet, into the picture frame. He replaced the back made sure the pictures were straight, and handed the frame back to the saleslady. Who then wrapped it in red wrapping paper and a pink bow.  
When she was finished, Gohan left the store and met up with Vegeta and a blushing Goku.  
"How did you do, get a gift for Bulma?"  
"Yeah and for myself," he chuckled as he held up the newly wrapped package in red " Red lingerie and strawberry body oil I'm going to have fun tomorrow."  
And with that they finally left the mall.  
Gohan looked at his father who hadn't made a peep the whole time since they left the mall.  
"Dad you okay?"   
Goku snapped out of his stupor, at the sound of his son's voice. " Huh oh yeah," he was still blushing.  
"Yeah I was just wondering what Victoria's Secret is if she wears something like that."  
"Maybe she's a prostitute,"  
Just then they heard the sound of gunshots and police sirens.  
"Uh oh guys I'll be right back," Gohan said as he quickly turned into the Great Saiyanman," Vegeta can you hold this?" Gohan asked him holding out his package he'd ask his dad but he was in a rather painful brainstorming session. Vegeta complied and Gohan quickly flew off to the source of the noise.  
When Gohan arrived he had found that Videl was already there in her GS2 outfit. He smiled as he watched her uppercut a guy in the face and kicked another simultaneously in the stomach. He quickly helped her take care of the last of the criminals, handing them off to the police. They then performed the Great Saiya team motto (I don't know it, so use you imaginations). And flew off together to a nearby building and to press the buttons on their watches in order to go back to their normal clothes.  
"So Gohan where were you today? I called you, and all I got was the machine telling me you were busy searching for the dragonballs so you could wish for the Pokemon characters to be real."  
"What? Oh Goten was probably messing with it again, he's had a obsession with show lately, No auctually I was out with my dad and Vegeta searching for Valentines day presents."  
"Oh really? So what did you get me?"  
" Oh nothing yet I got something for my other twenty girlfriends first," he said jokingly as Videl punched him in the shoulder.  
"Not funny well anyway I got your gift as well as my fifty other boyfriends, I'll give it to you tomorrow when you come over."  
"Okay bye Videl," he said as he flew back towards the waiting pair.  
"Humph finally, well let's go I want to get back to your house so I can finally start the training session."  
Vegeta said as he handed Gohan a bag, and flew back towards Mount Pouzu.   
  
  
Okay this story isn't over yet if you want to see chapter 2 please read and review. Hint to what's going to happen, the gifts get switched. Mr. Satan goes nuts and Bulma is confused.  



	2. Default Chapter Title

VALENTINES DAY FOLLY PART DUEX  
  
"Vegeta breakfast's ready," Bulma called from the kitchen. It was Valentines Day morning and he couldn't wait to give her his gift. (You have to read chapter one to get what I'm talking about.) He smirked as he pulled the red wrapping papered box from under the bed and carried it with him into the kitchen.  
"Where's Trunks?" Vegeta asked looking about,  
"Oh he's at Goku and ChiChi's house to play."  
"Perfect," he said as he wrapped his arm around Bulma's waist, and with the other gave her "their gift". "Happy Valentines Day."  
Bulma was shocked she never figured Vegeta would even participate in a stupid earth custom, as he called it. She smiled but immediately frowned.  
"I didn't bother to get you anything," she said guiltily.  
"Oh you still have a chance to give me something." He purred.  
"Should I open it now or after breakfast?" Bulma asked sweetly.  
Vegeta glanced at the breakfast she had prepared, burnt toast, and charred bacon and something he could only pray was eggs. "Definitely now." He said.  
"Okay." She said as she went into the living room so she could sit and open the gift.  
Vegeta wasn't paying attention as she unwrapped the bow and wrappings. He was too busy removing his shirt.  
What the heck? Bulma thought as she saw what Vegeta gave her. "Vegeta it's a very pretty frame but why would I want pictures of Gohan and Videl."  
"WHAT!?!?" Vegeta look down to see Bulma indeed had a picture frame with pictures of the smiling couple. "Now how the hell did that..." Vegeta stopped in mid sentence, and as it came to him he suddenly burst out laughing.  
  
Meanwhile at the Satan residence.  
  
"Oh hi Gohan my boy how are you today?" Asked Mr. Satan, when he answered the door.  
"Fine thanks," Gohan smiled he's in a good mood today that's a first he thought. "Where's Videl?"  
"She's in the living room with us," Replied Mr. Satan.  
"Hi Videl," Gohan said as he sat down next to his love.   
"Hi"  
"Hiya Gohan", said Buu who was sitting on the opposite couch, eating a big bag of candy hearts. "Look what Videl gave me."  
"That's great Buu," he told him as he changed his attention back to Videl, "is that the gift you got for one of your fifty boyfriends.' He asked jokingly.  
Videl glared at him.  
"What?" asked Mr.Satan.  
"Nothing dad inside joke," Videl said as she grabbed a small pink package "this is for you."  
Gohan smiled as he took it, he opened it to find a cool dragon pendent inside, "wow thanks Videl,"  
He said admiring the smooth silver.   
"The pendent is supposed to symbolize wisdom, strength and is supposed to protect the wearer from harm."  
"Wow thanks," he said as he put it on. "Here this one is for you," he said as he grabbed the package for her off of the table and handed it to her.  
"I just know you'll love this, the moment I saw this I thought of you."  
Videl smiled as she removed the paper, he was such a sweetheart. Gohan watched her intently as she pulled off the top and removed the tissue paper. (Recap Mr. Satan is still in the room.)  
" Oh Gohan it's .. Lingerie and edible body oil?" She looked at him confused and slightly horrified.  
"What the hey that's not what I got y..."  
"BOOOOOOYYYYYY!!!!!!!!" Mr. Satan screamed as he lunged at Gohan.  
"Whoa! DAMN VIDELI HOPE THIS PENDENT THING WORK" He said as he evaded a very POED Mr. Satan. "Okay let me explain," Gohan stammered as he avoided another punch, it was not as if Mr. Satan's could kill him, but he wasn't powered up now, so in retrospect Mr. Satan's punches won't bruise but they wouldn't tickle either.  
"EXPLAIN? YOU EXPLAINED IT PERFECTLY BEFORE THE MOMENT I SAW IT I THOUGHT OF YOU," He said as he took another throw for Gohan's face accidentally missing and breaking a vase instead. "STOP MOVING YOU HENTAI PERV."  
"NOT UNTIL YOU LISTEN, MY GIFT FOR HER GOT SWITCHED WITH WHOOPS!" Gohan ducked a kick from Mr. Satan that instead crashed into the TV; it fell over with a spark and crashed to the floor. Throughout the ordeal Videl sat dumbfounded on the couch still holding the lingerie and body oil.  
  
"I guess we didn't get here in time," Vegeta said as he held Bulma in his arms. They had touched down at the Satan residence, to switch the gifts back when they heard the crash and Mr. Satan's yelling.  
Bulma casually knocked on the door admiring the property as the crashing and yelling of Gohan and Mr. Satan resumed. "Y'know that's the kind of fountain I wanted for our lawn."  
Just then the door opened, "May I help you?" Asked a rather shaken up butler.  
"Oh yes is Gohan here?" asked Bulma.  
"In there but I wouldn't go in there if I were you, Mr. Satan is very angry because Gohan gave Videl a very private gift right in front of him."  
Vegeta couldn't take it anymore and burst out laughing for the second time that day.  
"Yes we know there was a mix-up of gifts we came to exchange them." Bulma said.  
"Oh dear I hope the boy's all right then, please come in come in."  
Just then Gohan's and Mr. Satan's yelling stopped.  
"Oh my god he killed him." Vegeta said as he and Bulma ran into the living room. When they ran in a very odd sight greeted them. Gohan had Mr. Satan in a headlock with Mr. Satan's face put against the floor, Videl on the couch with shocked expression on her face still holding the accursed items and Buu sitting there casually munching on some candy hearts.  
"Are you going to listen now." Gohan asked Mr. Satan who was still in a headlock.  
"Yemsh" He replied in a muffled tone.  
"Thank you it was a mix-up of Vegeta and my gift, I got Videl something else." Gohan said to his "prisoner."  
"Hi Gohan how are you." Said Bulma now letting their presence be known.  
"Just peachy keen. How do you think I am?"  
"Well I'm sure you had a interesting morning," she said while pulling the frame out of her purse and putting it in front of Gohan and Mr. Satan.  
"See that's what I got Videl, the kinky stuff was for Bulma from Vegeta." Gohan exclaimed. "Now I'm going to let you go now okay."  
"OFAY"  
Gohan released his grip grabbed the frame and walked back to the couch where a still stunned Videl sat.  
"Happy Valentines Day honey" Gohan smiled as he handed her his gift. Videl finally acknowledged the world and looked at Gohan. "Oh Gohan it's lovely," she said genuinely, she studied each picture remembering when they were taken. "It's wonderful a much better gift than lingerie, at least when my dad is around."  
Gohan smiled and handed Vegeta back the box with the "Delicates" in it.  
So a happy ending for the young couple where true love will avail, Bad for Mr. Satan because his nose has major rugburn, and good for Buu because he has many more bags of candy hearts.  
Now let's look at Vegeta and Bulma back at Capsule Corp.  
"It's beautiful Vegeta," Bulma said admiring the red silk fabric.  
"Put it on," He urged her from his place on the bed.  
"Okay fine I.. a SIZE 16 THAT'S 8 SIZES BIGGER THAN ME! WHAT ARE YOU SAYING THAT I PUT ON WEIGHT? THAT'S IT YOU'RE SLEEPING ON THE COUCH VEGETA."  
"Wait but Woman.."  
"DON'T SWEETTALK ME VEGETA YOUR SLEEPING ON THE COUCH AND THAT'S FINAL"  
So are very sad Vegeta, slept on the couch.  
  
THE END  
Don't ask me why I ended the story this way I just wanted to torture Vegeta a little, Okay so how did you like it PLEASE R/R no flamers please, unless it's constructive critiscm then I'm all for it. And as for the mean flamers going around fanfiction.net remember this "The Wiseman questions himself the FOOL questions others."  
  
  



End file.
